Tuesday, September 16, 2008

I'm Still Here

Yeah, I'm still here. Between work and the current madness I've just not been able, nor had much heart, to post.

You see, my dad is dying now, as we speak. Just a few days after Dino's service, he called me to say he'd been diagnosed with advanced liver disease (cirrhosis) and needed a liver transplant.

As sons ought to do, I talked it over with him and with his doctor, then got papers drawn up by a lawyer, all that power-of-attorney stuff, y'know. Dad was more than happy to sign it all. He's always needed a lot of looking after, and had no qualms about taking full advantage of his neediness. Well, that was my little cynical streak talking in the midst of caring about him and loving him.

I was concerned with all of the details of getting him into and through the candidates process. When your liver shuts down, a lot of nasty things happen inside you. We had to get him into an extended care facility, a rest home of sorts, because stuff would keep happening to his body that required constant supervision, which he didn't really have at home.

Home. He's been living with his sister, bless her heart. She lets him stay there out of love and caring, and he's really not very grateful. The man is destitute. Everything he has besides a few pieces of furniture is the $100 bill and his latest paltry social security check I'm using to open up a bank account for him. I had intended to use it to get his mess of bills in order and set up a little allowance for him. Now we're probably going to be using it toward his funeral expenses.

Fortunately he spent just enough time in the army to be eligible for a range of VA benefits, and he's 65, so he gets Medicare, otherwise who knows where he'd be right now.

They're going to try another couple things over the next 48 hours. The likelihood of them working is severely low. I live 4 hours away, and after spending several days there, then coming home to take care of that front, I'll be up again on Thursday and, barring a miraculous turnaround probably need to make the decision to let him go with some peace and dignity.

Then write my third eulogy in less than two months.

I feel like this has become the Death Blog.

I hope he somehow finds a way to survive. Whatever he does, I hope this season is about over, because I really just want to take the time to blog about some little things of little significance, like movies and cupcakes and whatever.



It's about me, dummy!!!


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