Mindless Drivel = Pure Comedy

In order to respond to the accusation that my blog was devoid of drivel and contained only serious content, I have initiated this entry of my best attempts at comedy.

(ahem)

Take airline food. What's up with that stuff?

Don't get me started.

And then there's long lines at the DMV. What's up with that? Do that many people really have cars?

Know what I'm sayin'?

Speaking of long lines, how many of you saw Gigli? What's up with that movie?

Those two should just get married.

And why do women have to go to the bathroom together? What's up with that?

Know what I mean, dudes?

And who invented neckties? What was up with him?

Now I'll do a couple of impressions.

Ronald Reagan: "Well..."

Gerald Ford: (falls down)

George Bush Sr.: "Thousand Points of Light... Wouldn't be prudent."

Dubya: "What we had here is a failsafe to commiserate."

Dan Quayle: "Potatoe"

Marcel Marceau:

Jerry Lewis: "Hey Laaaaaady!"

Desi Arnaz: "You can't be in da cho!"

Lucille Ball: "Awwww, Rickyyyyyyy."

Jay Leno: (chin)

David Letterman: (gap)

Johnny Carson: "I do, again and again and again and again..."

Liz Taylor: "Yeah? Well I do more than you do on a bad day..."

Demi Moore: "Ashton, honey, soon as you're done with dinner, I'll let you down from the high chair."

Ahston Kutcher: "For show and tell today I bwought pics of me and Ms. Moore doing the hootchy-kootchy."

Bill Clinton: (drops pants at next female to pass by)

Arnold Schwarzenegger: "I'll be back." (grope)

Don't even get me started...